CHICOPEE, Mass. (Mass Appeal) - Surviving Valentine's Day without the one you love can be difficult. Clinical Psychologist Dr. Tim Hope shared some advice on how to deal with heartbreak.
The Stages of Heartbreak:
Someone who is dealing with heartbreak may experience similar feelings with others who have lost someone:
1. Shock and Denial - the person deny the reality of the situation; this provides emotional protection from feeling overwhelmed by the situation.
2. Pain and Guilt - after the shock wears off it becomes replaced with suffering and what can feel like unbearable pain. There may be regret, rumination over what happened, or mourning for what now will not happen in the future.
3. Anger and Bargaining - lashing out is a common form of attempting to release all unspoken emotions. This is the stage where the "why why why?!" questioning comes in. There may be pleas for returned love, attempts to win the lost love back, or promises of change to try to bargain with fate or with the person who was just lost.
4. Depression, Reflection, and Loneliness - like everyone else in this situation, a period of sadness can evelop the person, and it can become a true clinical depression.
5. Acceptance and an Upward Turn - The feelings of depression lift slightly and life becomes possible to live survive without the lost loved one. The reality of the situation is fully accepted and, although happiness may not return for some time, the ability to move forward has occurred.
How to Mend A Broken Heart
The best thing for a broken heart is to be patient and allow time to settle all unresolved feelings. Talking through feelings with friends or family help to ease the coping with the loss. Keep busy with enjoyable hobbies or pleasant activities. Try new things to keep the mind busy, active and engaged during hard times. Get a group of friends together and watch a movie, or try a quiet walk through a forest or around the neighborhood. Give, contribute time, and help others. Acceptance of ourselves for who we are and loving ourselves are important so that love can be possible again in the future.